MANAGE EXPECTATIONS, EMOTIONS AND ACTIONS

Managing your expectations is key to surviving the hardest times. If each time something bad happens, your expectation is that it will immediately be corrected, then there is a good chance that you’ll be greatly disappointed. This saps your energy and will to go on. Expect that these things are complex, move slowly and that overall, it tends to work out well in the long term.

Pace yourself, the legal wheels move slowly

• The world in general and certainly something as complex as family breakdown and family law does not work fast and it’s not always easy to see the logic of the decisions made when you’re in a highly emotive state.
• It is understandable to feel overwhelmed and frustrated when coping with the stress of relationship breakdown and the family law process. It cannot be easy to understand why things move slowly in such a complex area and why decisions that don’t always make sense emotionally are made. However, it is essential to remember that family law covers many issues, such as parenting arrangements, property division, asset protection and spousal maintenance. These matters can be complex and stressful and often require mediation or dispute resolution processes that take time. Coming to our peer support groups Dads in Distress and Mums in Distress provides support and learning through lived experience.
• Separating parents must remember that the legal wheels move slowly. While this can be frustrating, it is also an excellent opportunity to build a medium- to long-term strategy. Quick fixes are possible, but they are rare. Focusing on understanding your situation better and developing a plan to help you in the future is essential. Having realistic expectations and being patient with the courts will help ensure you get the best outcome for your family. By taking some time to sort through all of your case’s details and providing that each step is done correctly, separating parents can give themselves their best chance at securing an agreement or ruling that works for them in the long term.

Inform and prepare yourself

• Many resources are available to help separated parents better understand the legal system and their options. These resources can provide invaluable assistance in navigating the often complex and time-consuming separation process. No matter how complicated the process may be, it’s essential never to give up hope. With patience, strategic planning, and a sound support system, you can reach an outcome that works for you and your family.

Try to stay calm and reach out to us if you need help

• When you feel anger rising, it can be hard to stay in control. But Parents Beyond Breakup are here to help parents manage their feelings and constructively work through such difficult times. Our helpline operators can listen and offer advice whenever needed, while our peer support groups provide a safe and caring environment for parents facing similar challenges. With a proven track record of success, Dads in Distress and Mums in Distress bring together parents from all over the country dealing with something similar and provide them with the tools they need to move forward positively.
• Make the first step and start your journey towards a more positive future with parents beyond breakup. We’ll be there every step of the way to provide understanding and guidance – allowing you to channel your anger in a productive, constructive manner. Reach out now and let parents beyond breakup help you move towards a brighter future.
• A common and easy exercise is to list off all your challenges under the headings of (1) things I can control, (2) things I can influence and (3) things I have no control over. When you’ve done that, work on the items in (1), work on developing your approach to the items in (2) and think of not wasting time, energy, and emotion on items in list (3). Set realistic expectations and timescales, and you’re a long way towards managing your situation in the best way.